Woman, 60, Stabs Boyfriend Over Alleged Cheating During Monopoly Game

A New Mexico woman repeatedly stabbed her boyfriend after accusing him of cheating during a Monopoly game early yesterday, according to police.

Laura Chavez, 60, and her boyfriend were playing the popular board game at her Santa Fe apartment when the dispute occurred. Chavez, pictured in the mug shot at right, allegedly admitted stabbing her beau, Clyde "Butch" Smith, with a kitchen knife.

Police reported that both Chavez and the 48-year-old Smith appeared to be intoxicated. The man, who cops found bleeding heavily from wounds on his head and right wrist, was hospitalized yesterday in stable condition. Smith told investigators that Chavez first hit him over the head with a glass bottle and then “grabbed a knife and began cutting him, causing injuries to the top of his head, neck, left eye brow and right wrist area."

When cops arrived at Chavez’s building, she was sitting under the porch “covered with suspected blood.” Asked if the blood was Smith’s, she answered, “Yes, I fucked him up.”

Chavez went to jail, went directly to jail on a variety of charges, including aggravated battery on a household member with a deadly weapon and battery on a law enforcement officer. She is being held in the Santa Fe county lockup in lieu of $5000 bond (or until she rolls doubles).

Chavez’s 10-year-old grandson, who had been playing with the two adults, told officers that his grandmother began to argue with Smith because she thought he “was cheating at Monopoly,” according to a probable cause statement. The boy, who had gone to bed before the stabbing began, did not further describe the alleged cheating.

But any fan of the Parker Brothers game would know that said cheating would likely involve either a) collecting $200 before passing “Go”; b) nipping some gold $100 bills from the bank; or c) landing on Baltic Avenue, but palming the Boardwalk property card.