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    A multitasking pervert is behind bars after Florida cops arrested him for masturbating as he squirted hair conditioner on the “buttocks area” of female shoppers at Target, cops report.

    Brian Dijon Boyd, 27, was arrested Sunday afternoon in connection with a series of vile encounters at a Target in Tampa, according to a police report.

    Store surveillance video recorded Boyd “knowingly and intentionally squirting white in color hair conditioner” on the “back and buttocks area” of four unsuspecting female victims. As he crept up on the women, Boyd has his sweat pants “pulled down away from the waist area” and was “stroking what appeared to be his penis.”

    When confronted by a sheriff’s deputy, the 6’1”, 300-pound Boyd pulled away from the cop and escaped from Target. He was subsequently apprehended and charged with six misdemeanors, including fours counts of battery and indecent exposure.

    Pictured above, Boyd is being held in the Hillsborough County jail on $6000 bond. Boyd has a lengthy rap sheet that includes collars for marijuana possession; contempt; possession of drug paraphernalia; violating probation; theft; credit card fraud; carrying a concealed weapon; and exposure of sexual organ (for which he was convicted last year).

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    An undercover vice operation targeting a Florida massage parlor netted a 70-year-old woman who allegedly “offered to masturbate the detective” for an additional $60, according to an arrest report.

    Septuagenarian Sun Hee Gribat was collared Tuesday at Jax Therapy in Jacksonville. Police began probing the business after receiving reports that female employees performed sex acts on customers.

    After an undercover detective paid Gribat $70 for a 30-minute rubdown, she led him to a massage room. During the massage, cops allege, Gribat allegedly “offered to masturbate the detective for additional $60.00.”

    Gribat, seen above, was subsequently arrested for prostitution and unlicensed practice of a health care profession. After spending a day in jail, Gribat was released from custody Wednesday after posting bond. 

    According to Illinois court records, Gribat was arrested in 2014 on a prostitution charge. Gribat, then 67, was working at a St. Charles massage parlor when she offered to lend a hand to an undercover cop. In a plea deal, Gribat entered a one-year deferred prosecution program.

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    A Florida man who has his mother’s full name tattooed on his chest was arrested early Saturday for shoving the woman to the ground during a confrontation in their residence, cops report.

    Investigators allege that Thomas Pinson, 21, battered his mother Carmon, 47, around 3:45 AM Saturday. Pinson, police say, “grabbed his mother with two hands and shoved her backwards into a kitchen chair.” She then fell to ground “and hit her head as a result of being shoved,” a criminal complaint charges.

    Pinson, who fled his family’s St. Petersburg home before police arrived, was subsequently apprehended and charged with domestic battery, a misdemeanor. Pinson was released yesterday afternoon on his own recognizance from the Pinellas County jail.

    According to police and jail records, Pinson (seen above) has “Carmon Pinson” inked on his chest. Next to that tribute is a tattoo of a rose.

    Pinson’s rap sheet includes collars for marijuana possession, attempted robbery with a firearm, and grand theft auto. But he has only been convicted of the pot charge.

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    A McDonald’s employee was kicked in the stomach by an “irate and violent” customer who was “extremely unhappy with his service in the drive-thru,” according to Florida cops.

    Investigators allege that William Silva, 49, exploded after being "tied up" in the drive-thru lane, which was “backed up” Sunday around 10:30 PM.

    Silva, cops say, entered the Clearwater McDonald’s (seen below) and started screaming and cursing at employees. After being asked to calm down, Silva allegedly attacked worker Manuel Cano, who was off-duty at the time.

    Silva, a criminal complaint alleges, "delivered a front kick" to Cano, who countered with several blows to Silva’s head.

    While Silva, pictured at right, denied starting the January 1 altercation or creating a disturbance inside the restaurant, his account of the incident was contradicted by Cano and a McDonald’s manager.

    Silva was arrested for disorderly conduct and battery, both misdemeanors. He was released from the county jail last night after posting $650 bond. Silva’s rap sheet includes convictions for cocaine possession and possession of drug paraphernalia.

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    Meet Cody James Romano.

    The 25-year-old Wisconsin resident rang in the New Year by performing an exquisite belly flop atop the windshield of a police cruiser, as seen in the above dashcam footage.

    Romano, for some reason, charged the stationary squad car shortly after midnight Sunday. As he reached the vehicle’s front end, Romano launched himself into the air. Upon landing, Romano smashed the windshield of the cruiser (pictured below), which was occupied by a Menasha Police Department officer.

    After a scuffle with cops, Romano was taken into custody and transported to a local hospital for treatment. He was then booked into the county jail on multiple charges, including battery to a law enforcement officer, disorderly conduct, and criminal damage to property.

    Investigators say that Romano (seen above) “had been drinking” prior to his ill-conceived execution of the January 1 belly flop in Menasha, a city about 35 miles south of Green Bay.

    According to his LinkedIn page, Romano works as a customer service manager at Walmart.

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    Angered that “Christian music” was being played inside a McDonald’s, a Florida man cursed at employees and other patrons and demanded that they “turn it off and play Muslim and Hindu music,” according to cops who arrested the customer.

    Joseph Allen, 46, walked into the McDonald’s around 10:20 AM Tuesday and created “a threat to the safety of others,” according to a Largo Police Department report.

    Allen, cops say, “began cursing at customers and employees” due to the “Christian music” being played over speakers in the fast food restaurant (seen below). The “Christian music” to which Allen referred was apparently Christmas tunes.

    Allen, who appeared intoxicated, approached McDonald’s workers "in an aggressive manner," leaving the employees “in fear for their safety.”

    Police responding to a 911 call confronted Allen, who reportedly admitted to cursing at McDonald’s workers and customers. A search of Allen turned up a small bag of methamphetamine in a pants pocket. Seen above, Allen was booked into the county jail on disorderly conduct and narcotics possession charges.

    Allen, a convicted felon, is locked up in lieu of $2150 bond. His lengthy rap sheet includes busts for assault; robbery; grand theft; trespass; battery; disorderly intoxication; lewd and lascivious exhibition; distributing stolen property; criminal mischief; and carrying a concealed weapon.

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    An argument between two Denny’s workers “over a hard boiled egg” was broken up yesterday by a South Carolina cop, according to a police report.

    In response to a 911 call about a “disturbance between employees,” a sheriff’s deputy arrived at the eatery in Spartanburg around 10:30 PM.  

    The cop learned that workers Nancy Michelle Kirkpatrick, 56, and Quanisha Dre’Shawn Fenn, 21, had “got into an argument over a hard boiled egg.” During the squabble, Fenn said, Kirkpatrick called her a “bitch.” “After that,” a cop reported, “Ms. Fenn called her mother.”

    Fenn’s mother, Toska Marie Lightner, 47, subsequently arrived at the Denny’s and began arguing with Kirkpatrick. During the squabble, Lightner threw a tape dispenser at Kirkpatrick (who was not struck by the item).

    Kirkpatrick declined to press an assault charge against Lightner.

    The police report does not further detail why two adults were arguing over a hard-boiled egg.

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    Meet Derek Edwards.

    The 26-year-old Iowan’s holiday spirit appears to have sagged early Sunday after he was arrested for drunk driving. Following a minor accident, Edwards was found by cops at the wheel of his 2016 Chevrolet Malibu.

    Edwards, an Iowa City resident, smelled of booze, had bloodshot eyes, and impaired speech, according to a police report. A subsequent Breathalyzer test recorded his blood alcohol content at nearly three times the legal limit.

    As seen above, the teary Edwards was wearing a festive Christmas sweater when he posed for his mug shot. Court records do not identify Edwards’s holiday drink of choice.

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    The Colorado landlord who was recorded on a home security camera having sex in his tenants’s bed is free on bond following his arrest on trespass and obscenity charges, records show.

    Carlos Quijada-Lara, 39, was busted last week and spent two days in jail before his release from custody. Seen in the adjacent mug shot, Quijada-Lara was scheduled for a hearing today in El Paso County Circuit Court.

    As TSG reported on December 2, Quijada-Lara is accused of illegally entering the Colorado Springs apartment of Logan Pierce and Mikaela DiGiulio in late-November. A motion detection camera in the condo’s bedroom recorded Quijada-Lara and another man having sex on the married couple’s bed.

    During their six-minute encounter, Quijada-Lara and his partner are seen engaging in oral and anal sex. When finished, Quijada-Lara’s acquaintance wiped his genitals with one of DiGiulio’s dresses. The soiled garment, Pierce told TSG, had been worn by his wife at the pair’s wedding in March.

    Pierce and DiGiulio rented the $1100-a-month apartment from Quijada-Lara after responding to a Craigslist ad in July. The couple vacated the premises after discovering that it had been used as a hook-up spot while they were away at work.

    Quijada-Lara (left) and his partner are seen disrobing in the below screenshot from the security video. Quijada-Lara’s partner has not been charged.

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    Two days after FBI Director James Comey wrote Congress to disclose the apparent discovery of additional Hillary Clinton e-mails, the bureau told a federal judge that a review of the material would likely produce evidence of the improper handling of classified material, court records show.

    In fact, a subsequent FBI analysis of the e-mails determined that the correspondence--found on a laptop shared by Clinton aide Huma Abedin and her husband Anthony Weiner--contained no information to alter the previous FBI conclusion that Clinton should not face charges in connection with her use of a private e-mail server when she was Secretary of State.

    The FBI’s justification for reviewing thousands of e-mails found on the Dell Inspiron laptop--which was seized in connection with a sexting probe targeting Weiner--are contained in a search warrant application that was unsealed (with redactions) today in U.S. District Court in Manhattan.

    The FBI’s October 30 search warrant application, which was approved by Magistrate Kevin Fox, was prepared and filed by Department of Justice prosecutors.

    Click here to download a PDF of the 21-page court filing.

    According to an affidavit sworn by an FBI supervisor whose name was redacted from the filing, investigators contended that there was probable cause to believe that the Abedin/Weiner laptop contained “evidence, contraband, fruits and/or other items illegally possessed” in violation of criminal statutes dealing with the handling of sensitive “national defense” material.

    Noting that the Dell laptop contained thousands of Abdein e-mails, the FBI concluded that the cache included correspondence exchanged by Abedin and Clinton and that there was probable cause to believe that those e-mails contained “classified information which was produced by and is owned by the U.S. Government.” The laptop, the FBI added, “was never authorized for the storage or transmission of classified or national defense information.”

    A “complete forensic analysis” of the Dell computer, the FBI affidavit stated, would allow federal agents to “determine if classified information was accessed by unauthorized users or transferred to any unauthorized systems.”

    Following a review of the laptop, Comey issued a follow-up letter on November 6--two days before the presidential election--reporting that no evidence had been discovered to change the bureau’s prior finding that "no reasonable prosecutor" would file charges against Clinton.

    Though the names of Abedin and Weiner have been redacted from the documents, references to Abedin are contained in bracketed sections of the filing, according to an order by Judge P. Kevin Castel, who unsealed the search warrant records.

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    Meet Ryan Burdette.

    The 22-year-old Floridian was arrested this week in a prostitution sting. Burdette, cops say, responded to a Backpage.com ad posted by an undercover detective posing as a hooker.

    After meeting up at a Residence Inn in Port St. Lucie, Burdette allegedly negotiated with the female undercover and arrived at a price of $34 for an act detailed in a probable cause affidavit.

    Sadly, the court filing does not further describe the negotiation’s opening offer, counter proposal, or how the pair settled on such an odd price. Or if the accused john drove a hard bargain.

    Burdette was charged with soliciting prostitution, a misdemeanor.

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    A chrome-domed criminal will serve two years in prison for heading a Rogaine theft ring that targeted more than two dozen pharmacies in Ohio, according to court records.

    Andres Arias, 36, pleaded guilty Tuesday in Common Pleas Court in Warren County and was sentenced on a felony count.

    Arias, seen above, was named earlier this year in a 12-count indictment charging him with participating in an “organized retail theft ring” that victimized numerous CVS and Walgreens stores. As part of a plea deal, prosecutors dropped money laundering and theft raps in return for Arias’s plea to engaging in corrupt activity, the indictment’s top charge.

    According to investigators, Arias, a Florida resident, and several cohorts stole Rogaine and other over-the-counter drugs from the pharmacies and then shipped the products to a “retail fence” in New Jersey. “Some of the items would then appear online to be sold on eBay,” the indictment noted.

    The stolen Rogaine was not for the personal use of the bald Arias, who is now known as prisoner A730999 in Ohio’s Department of Rehabilitation & Correction.

    In addition to serving two years in custody, Arias has also been ordered to pay $22,000 in restitution.

    Ohio, Rogaine, theft
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    An Oregon man arrested Monday posed for a mug shot with his pet parrot on his shoulder.

    Following a court hearing, a Washington County judge ordered Craig Buckner, 38, jailed for violating release terms in connection with multiple misdemeanor theft cases.

    Buckner, not expecting to land behind bars, arrived at the courthouse with his four-year-old red parrot, which he placed in a tree before heading inside the building.

    After Buckner was taken into custody, he told a court deputy that his companion parrot was outside in a tree. Concerned for the bird’s safety, the deputy accompanied Buckner--who was handcuffed and shackled at the waist--to retrieve the parrot (which, by then, was surrounded by crows).

    As seen above, Buckner posed for a series of mug shots, one of which shows the parrot perched on his left shoulder. The parrot was subsequently picked up by a friend of Buckner’s who agreed to care for the bird.

    Buckner will be able to reunite with his parrot if he can post $10,000 bond, according to jail records.

    According to his Facebook and LinkedIn pages, Buckner owns Pacific Coast Cannabis Plantation, a “Medical marijuana/Hash Lab” that grows “High Quality Flower and we make concentrates both solvent and solventless extracts becoming one of the most sought after products in the dispensaries.”