Monthly archive

Facebook is blocked!

  • Comments: ()

    A man arrested Monday for masturbating at a bus stop identified himself as James Tiberius Kirk upon his arrest by Florida police, according to court records.

    The perp claiming to be Captain Kirk was spotted around 11:20 AM vigorously “stroking his penis that was under his shorts,” reported a Clearwater patrolman. The action “corrupted the public morals and sense of public decency,” alleged investigators.

    After the defendant stroked himself for more than two minutes, a cop asked what he was doing. “The defendant stated, ‘I’m scratching myself.’”

    Upon being arrested for disorderly conduct, the man said that he carried no ID, but gave his name as that of the commander of the starship USS Enterprise. Cops actually did a “wants/warrant check” on the Kirk name, which came back with negative results.

    Police subsequently used a facial recognition program to determine that “Kirk” was actually James Roger Bundrick, 56. In addition to the disorderly conduct rap, Bundrick was charged with a second misdemeanor, providing a false name to law enforcement. He is being held in the Pinellas County jail in lieu of $400 bond.

    Pictured above, Bundrick is a convicted felon who was released from state prison in August 2016 after serving nearly four years in custody on multiple felony charges.

  • Comments: ()

    In what the arresting officer described as a “coupon conundrum,” a patron allegedly attacked a Burger King worker who would not accept several coupons for discounted Whoppers, according to an arrest affidavit.

    Police say Miguel Latorre, 23, tried to use his coupons at a Burger King in Largo, Florida Saturday afternoon. However, there apparently was some kind of problem with Latorre’s coupons.

    When Burger King worker Charlotte Price “attempted to explain the coupon conundrum,” reported Officer Stephanie Blitz, Latorre, seen at right, became “engaged and frustrated by the Whopper coupon situation.”

    Latorre allegedly grabbed Price by the wrist and attempted to pull her over the counter. “A physical altercation ensued,” said Blitz, who noted that several witnesses observed Latorre’s coupon meltdown.

    Charged with battery, Latorre was booked into the county jail on the misdemeanor count. He was released from custody after a relative posted $500 bond.

  • Comments: ()

    Meet Terri Havens.

    The 49-year-old New York State resident--a convicted sex offender--has been jailed for violating parole terms, investigators report.

    Havens, who spent more than a decade in prison for sodomizing a five-year-old girl, was placed on parole last September, according to state corrections records. Havens allegedly violated his release terms by ignoring his curfew and using a smartphone to get online.

    The phone was discovered during a search of Havens’ residence in Mount Morris, a town about 40 miles south of Rochester. The search was prompted after a local woman reported to cops that Havens had posted a Craigslist ad seeking a personal aide (Havens is barred from using the internet).

    Havens, pictured above in a March 2018 sex offender registry photo, is locked up in the Livingston County jail in advance of a parole violation hearing.

     RELATED: Chicago man once wore disguise for his sex offender photo

  • Comments: ()

    A Virginia man who was twice spotted sauntering through a park wearing high heels and stockings--but no pants--has been arrested on indecent exposure charges, police report.

    Cops say Jeffrey Battaglia, 37, was observed sans pants on two separate occasions in March at Gypsy Hill Park in Staunton, a city about 40 miles from Charlottesville.

    A male witness reported seeing a man with his genitals exposed wearing a black hat, black dinner jacket, and high heels on March 8. A week later, a female witness also got a look at the private parts of the suspect, who was wearing a black jacket, high heels, and stockings.

    Police subsequently identified Battaglia, who lives about seven miles from Staunton, as the pantsless stroller.

    Battaglia, seen above, was charged with two counts of misdemeanor indecent exposure.

  • Comments: ()

    Hours after exchanging vows on a Florida beach, a newlywed couple was arrested after they got intoxicated and began battering each other inside a hotel room, police report.

    Daniel Gillen, 61, and GeGee Riposta, 49, were married Sunday on Clearwater Beach. The couple is seen at right in a wedding photo.

    According to arrest affidavits, Gillen and Riposta subsequently “became intoxicated” and “were arguing throughout the day.” Matters subsequently turned violent inside the couple’s room at the Clearwater Beach Hotel, police charge.

    Gillen told cops that Riposta “physically started to attack him by scratching him on the chest.” Gillen “had noticeable scratch marks and injury to his torso which was consistent with his statements,” investigators noted.

    Riposta said that Gillen grabbed her by the neck and pushed her to the ground. Riposta’s claim was supported by “noticeable scratches and scrape marks on her knee,” police reported.

    Gillen was arrested for misdemeanor domestic battery and was later released from custody on his own recognizance. Since Riposta had a prior battery conviction, she was charged with felony battery (and had to post $500 bond to get out of jail).

    A judge has ordered the newlyweds (seen in the below mug shots) to have no contact with each other. Court filings list the couple’s residence as a home in Davenport, a city about 90 miles inland from Clearwater Beach.

  • Comments: ()

    A Florida woman who was awakened early yesterday by the “sounds of loud moaning” discovered a naked man sprawled out on her deck with massage oil and a sex toy nearby and “bodily secretions on her patio window,” police report.

    Cops responding to a 2:15 AM 911 call found Christopher Worrell, 30, “completely nude” near the woman’s Largo residence. The woman told officers that she was “startled” by the presence of Worrell, whom she did not know.

    After being detained by police, Worrell said that he wished to speak to investigators, reported Officer Marissa Curry. However, subsequent attempts to question Worrell “were unsuccessful,” according to an arrest affidavit.

    Pictured above, Worrell was charged with lewd and lascivious behavior, a misdemeanor. He is being held in lieu of $250 bond at the county jail.

    While court records list the defendant’s residence as a home in Cape Coral--more than 130 miles from Largo--it appears that Worrell has recently been living as a transient in Largo. Worrell was arrested last month in Largo for stealing clothing and trying to break into a trailer. He was locked up on those felony counts until about three weeks ago, when prosecutors declined to pursue charges.

    Worrell’s rap sheet includes convictions for burglary, criminal damage, theft, dealing in stolen property, trespass, reckless driving, and narcotics possession.

  • Comments: ()

    4/20 UPDATE: Hammond was arrested last night on a pair of felony charges and booked into the Camden County jail, where he is being held without bond.

    Georgia police have identified the man who burglarized a GameStop store while wearing the world’s worst disguise--the plastic wrapping used to package water bottles.

    Cops report that Kerry Hammond Jr. is wanted in connection with last Friday’s burglary of the video game store in St. Marys, a city in Georgia’s southeastern corner.

    Investigators allege that the 22-year-old Hammond sought to hide his identity by wearing the plastic wrapping around his head. But Hammond--who is 6’ 1” and 275 pounds, did a poor job obscuring his face, as seen in video surveillance stills released by police. A distinctive tattoo on Hammond’s right forearm can also be seen in GameStop security video.

    Hammond, last spotted driving a white 2006 Ford Taurus, has two other active felony warrants charging him with burglary and criminal damage to property.

    Hammond--who has been dubbed “Big Dasani” by one Georgia wag--is seen in the below mug shot snapped after a prior arrest. In seeking the public’s assistance St. Marys police have noted that, “You can help us catch him, once you stop laughing.”

    dumbass, Georgia
  • Comments: ()

    Federal agents intercepted $2 million worth of crystallized methamphetamine that had been transported from Mexico inside wax figurines of Disney characters like Pluto, Donald Duck, and Winnie the Pooh.

    The 500-pound narcotics haul was seized by Drug Enforcement Administration agents working in Atlanta.

    Each of the figurines contained about a pound of crystallized meth that apparently was manufactured in Mexico.

    The knockoff wax figurines, seen in the above and below DEA photos, were shipped along with hundreds of legitimate ceramic Disney figurines, investigators say.

  • Comments: ()

    What kind of a person makes lewd comments to the Easter Bunny?

    Meet Ladonna Hughett.

    Cops say the 54-year-old Ohioan spent Saturday afternoon at a carousel park in Richland, a city midway between Columbus and Cleveland. Hughett “appeared intoxicated,” according to a witness who spoke with police.

    At one point, Hughett, seen at right, had her photo taken with the Easter Bunny. It was then that she “allegedly made lewd comments to the Bunny” before hopping on the carousel. Sadly, a Mansfield Police Department report does not further describe the inappropriate words reportedly whispered in the victim’s giant ears.

    Video shows Hughett perched on the Easter Bunny's lap with her right hand on the character's crotch. Watching this, a female onlooker can be heard saying, "Oh my! This is a kids event." A still from the video can be seen below.

    When officers confronted Hughett, she displayed various signs of intoxication, like slurred speech, bloodshot eyes, and a generally wobbly demeanor. She was arrested for public drunkenness and booked into the county jail.

    Hughett, who was convicted last year of aggravated assault, is not facing charges for her inappropriate comments to the Easter Bunny.

  • Comments: ()

    A Florida man was arrested early yesterday after telling police that his name was “Captain Dickhead.”

    Cops responding to a 1:45 AM disturbance at a residence in Sebastian encountered Pamela Alonge, who apologized for arguing loudly with her boyfriend in the home’s backyard.

    When asked multiple times to identify himself, the boyfriend refused and was “being evasive and argumentative with officers at the scene,” according to an arrest affidavit.

    After cops handcuffed the man, they took one more shot at extracting a name from him. “At which time he said his name was ‘Captain Dickhead,’” an officer reported.

    Investigators subsequently identified “Dickhead” as Joseph Boren, 25. He was arrested on a misdemeanor obstruction charge. After eight hours in custody, Boren (seen above) was released from jail on his own recognizance. Boren is scheduled for an April 17 court appearance.

  • Comments: ()

    A Minnesota man broke into a home early Saturday morning and cooked himself “children’s chicken nuggets” before police arrived and took him into custody, according to a court filing.

    Investigators say that Dylan Bradley Madden, 21, entered a Mankato home though an unlocked garage door around 2 AM. The residence was occupied at the time by a woman and her two juvenile children.

    Madden, seen above, found his way to the kitchen, where he cooked the chicken nuggets and got himself a drink. The homeowner, who confronted Madden inside the residence, told police that the intruder appeared inebriated.

    A subsequent breath test recorded Madden’s blood alcohol content at .10, just above the .08 limit. Madden, cops noted, “did not appear to be intoxicated to the point of not being able to make conscious decisions.”

    Madden was arrested on a felony burglary charge in connection with his quest for a post-midnight snack.

    Madden's rap sheet includes a 2016 felony conviction for which he was sentenced to five years probation. He violated terms of his release last year, but court records do not indicate what additional punishment may have been levied against Madden.

  • Comments: ()

    Most bucket lists include pursuits like skydiving, seeing the Northern Lights, or running with the bulls in Pamplona.

    But Tony Strasiser just wanted to steal something from Target.

    The 23-year-old Pennsylvania native was arrested yesterday after trying to boost bed sheets and Clif bars from a Target in Clearwater, Florida, according to an arrest affidavit.

    Strasiser, cops say, hid the merch in a reusable grocery bag and departed the store. But when he was subsequently confronted by a loss prevention officer, Strasiser dropped the stolen goods at the store’s entrance and fled on foot.

    Pictured above, Strasiser later returned to Target and apologized for his actions. He reportedly told a Clearwater Police Department officer that he "shoplifted as a thing for his 'bucket list.'" The theft, he added, was a “lapse of good judgment.”

    Charged with theft, Strasiser was booked into the county jail yesterday afternoon on the misdemeanor count. He was released around 11 PM after posting $250 bond.

    The 6’ 6” Strasiser was a high school football and baseball star who attended West Virginia University, where he played on the school’s baseball team in 2015. Strasiser, a biology major, graduated last year from WVU.

    Strasirer’s mother Lisa is the district attorney in Somerset County, Pennsylvania.

  • Comments: ()

    A 64-year-old Florida woman who “caught her fiancé...watching porn and masturbating” is facing a criminal charge for allegedly battering her beau, police say.

    According to an arrest report, Gayle Tindall last week discovered the victim pleasuring himself one morning with the aid of filmed entertainment in the couple’s Fort Pierce residence. Tindall and the man then argued for a bit before the victim headed to work.

    Upon the man’s return home, Tindall--who was reportedly still upset--allegedly “grabbed his arm digging her nails into his right forearm and scratching him.” The victim declined medical treatment, cops noted.    

    Tindall was arrested on a battery charge and booked into the county jail (from which she was released on $250 bond).

    As a condition of her release, Tindall was ordered to have no contact with the victim and she is not allowed to come within 500 feet of the couple’s residence. Seen above, Tindall is scheduled for a March 13 arraignment on the misdemeanor count.