Buster

Portland Cops Say "Occupy" Protesters Threatened To Assault Workers, Vandalize Pizzeria Over Breadstick Shortage

Of the many police blotter entries regarding “Occupy” encampments nationwide, here’s our favorite from the past few days, as reported by the Portland Police Bureau:

“Occupy Portland protesters became enraged when Pizza Schmizza ran out of breadsticks to accompany their entree order. They threatened to assault employees and vandalize the restaurant.”

A police spokesman told TSG that the incident Sunday evening involved a man and woman who became upset when they were told that the pizzeria had temporarily run out of breadsticks and that they would have to wait 15-20 minutes for a new batch. The customers, cops noted, told a Pizza Schmizza employee, “Your job is bullshit, you know you work for a big corporation.”

When asked to leave, the male customer threatened "to come back with a group of people when the restaurant closes,” police noted.

The breadsticks in question, according to the Pizza Schmizza web site, are “dipsticks hand made from our very own pizza dough.” The oven-baked delicacies (seen above) are served with either marinara, ranch, or Alfredo dipping sauce.

Officers checked the Occupy Portland encampment--which is a couple of blocks from Pizza Schmizza--but they “did not locate the suspects,” according to police. The aggrieved patrons did not return later, as threatened, with a breadstick posse.