Man Offers Cop Terrible Explanation For Why He Was Masturbating On Beach

After a cop caught him masturbating last night on a Florida beach, Byron Christianoudis apologized and offered an explanation, of sorts, for his alleged lewd behavior.

“My girlfriend was out of town and I miss her,” the 44-year-old Sarasota resident said, according to a criminal complaint.

Christianoudis was “sitting in the sand near the sand dunes” when Officer Darin Rath of the Indian Shores Police Department approached him from behind around 6 PM. Rath reported watching Christianoudis “rubbing his genital area (masturbating).”

While pleasuring himself, Christianoudis appeared to be “watching an adult female and a minor female child walking down the waters edge,” Rath noted.

When confronted by the cop, Christianoudis “made a spontaneous statement and apologized for his actions.” And then he spoke of pining for his departed sweetheart.

Christianoudis was arrested for lewd and lascivious behavior, a misdemeanor, and booked into the county jail, where he is being held on $250 bond.