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March 11, 2014

FBI: Military Contractor Caught Masturbating To Child Porn Inside Car At Colorado Army Base

According to federal investigators, Francis Calar, 53, did not initially notice a military policeman looking at him because he was "intently focused" on an illicit image on his laptop's screen.

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March 10, 2014

Reefer Badness: Teen Torched Mom's Clothes After She Refused To Give Him Money To Buy Pot

Meet John Carter.

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March 7, 2014

Cops: Florida Family Was Hospitalized After Eating LSD-Laced Steak Bought At Walmart

The four victims suffered hallucinations, dizziness, rapid heart rates, and difficulty breathing after consuming bottom round steak at dinner Monday night in their Tampa home.

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Rick Ross '11

Rapper and former Florida prison guard Rick Ross was arrested by Louisiana cops in March 2011 and charged with pot possession.

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Shakira

The pop star has few needs when touring. Though she does demand one jar of "Colombian Nescafe" coffee. Really, who needs fresh when something freeze-dried can be ordered?

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March 11, 2014

DOCUMENT: Drunk, Crime

Man Headed To Rehab Disrupts JetBlue Flight

Plane diverted after passenger threatens to kill flight attendant

Orion Koshinsky, 23, has never served in the armed forces. But he still announced to fellow passengers that, "I'm in the military and you can buy me drinks."

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March 10, 2014

DOCUMENT: Stupid, Crime

FBI: Facebook Selfie Sunk Bank Robbery Suspect

Man, 21, posed with machine gun he showed to teller

Jules "King Romeo" Bahler, who joined Facebook last month, is currently unable to update his status due to his arrest Friday.

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March 9, 2014

DOCUMENT: Roundups, Crime

Want To Be A Millionaire? First, Learn To Spell

Perp won't make Forbes 400, but does make TSG 15

Tens of thousands of Americans are arrested weekly. But only a handful of perps merit inclusion in our prestigious weekly review.

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Buster

FBI: Military Contractor Caught Masturbating To Child Porn Inside Car At Colorado Army Base

Reefer Badness: Teen Torched Mom's Clothes After She Refused To Give Him Money To Buy Pot

Cops: Florida Family Was Hospitalized After Eating LSD-Laced Steak Bought At Walmart

Rick Ross '11

Shakira

DOCUMENT: Man Headed To Rehab Disrupts JetBlue Flight

DOCUMENT: FBI: Facebook Selfie Sunk Bank Robbery Suspect

BUSTER: Reefer Badness: Teen Torched Mom's Clothes After She Refused To Give Him Money To Buy Pot

DOCUMENT: Woman Posted Explicit Material Inside Walmart

DOCUMENT: Want To Be A Millionaire? First, Learn To Spell

Man Headed To Rehab Disrupts JetBlue Flight

FBI: Facebook Selfie Sunk Bank Robbery Suspect

Want To Be A Millionaire? First, Learn To Spell

Fark

The Awl