Buster

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    “I stabbed the fuck out of the snake because I hate snakes.”

    That was the explanation Timothy Wagner, 23, gave Florida police Sunday evening following his arrest for animal cruelty.

    Cops allege that Wagner entered his ex-girlfriend’s St. Petersburg home and removed a knife from the kitchen. He then walked into the living room and “took the lid off the snake’s cage.”

    Wagner, cops charge, then began “stabbing the snake multiple times.” A patrolman reported observing “multiple stab wounds to the snake’s head and body.”

    A criminal complaint does not indicate whether the reptile was killed.

    Pictured above, Wagner was arrested for animal cruelty. He was released yesterday from the county jail after posting $150 bond.

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    Meet Christopher Wilson.

    The 37-year-old Cincinnati, Ohio resident has been arrested for assaulting and groping a female victim. While the alleged incident occurred more than two years ago, Wilson was not collared until Friday evening.

    Wilson, locked up in the Hamilton County jail, is scheduled for a court appearance this afternoon on the two misdemeanor charges.

    There is no indication that Wilson has been employed in the adult film industry.

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    Before robbing a bank Thursday morning, a Florida man prepped for the heist by searching Google for instructions on “how to rob a bank,” police report.

    Cops charge that William Johnson, 26, made off with about $2000 from the Achieva Credit Union in Largo. According to a criminal complaint, Johnson handed a teller an envelope with the words “give me money, no bait, I have gun” written on it.

    Within minutes of the crime, a subject matching the description of the robber entered a nearby Publix supermarket and purchased several lottery tickets, food, and a beverage.

    By late afternoon, cops had received multiple phone calls identifying Johnson as the bank robber (the sources had seen bank surveillance photos that police had posted to Facebook). Additionally, Johnson’s mother identified him as the man seen in the bank photos.

    Johnson (seen above) was subsequently arrested at an Express Inn & Suites in Pinellas Park. 

    During questioning, Johnson reportedly confessed to the robbery and copped to the incriminating Google search. Johnson, cops say, revealed that he was plotting a second bank heist, apparently because he had already spent the proceeds from the October 5 robbery on rent, utilities, and narcotics.

    Charged with felony robbery, Johnson is being held in the county jail in lieu of $100,000 bond. Johnson’s rap sheet includes arrests for grand theft, dealing in stolen property, probation violation, and felony battery (for which he was on probation until mid-April).

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    A Dunkin’ Donuts patron tried to pay for a cup of coffee with prescription muscle relaxants, according to Florida police who arrested the man on a drug charge.

    Richard Bourque, 30, allegedly tried the coffee-for-pills gambit late Monday evening at a Dunkin’ Donuts in Pinellas Park. An employee told police that when she rejected Bourque’s barter offer of “unknown pills,” he walked out with the coffee.

    Cops subsequently located Bourque at a nearby McDonald’s. After he reportedly agreed to be searched, a patrolman located eight pills that were later identified as methocarbamol, a drug prescribed for muscle pain and stiffness.

    Bourque, seen above, was arrested when he could not produce a prescription for the pills (which he said were “given to him by ‘Aaron’”). Bourque was not charged with boosting the Dunkin’ Donuts coffee.

    Bourque yesterday pleaded no contest to a misdemeanor charge of possession of drugs without a prescription. He was fined $550 and sentenced to a day in jail. Bourque’s rap sheet includes collars for domestic battery, theft, violating probation, and driving with a revoked or suspended license.

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    A North Carolina inmate this week was enjoying a bologna sandwich when he took a moment to pose for a new mug shot.

    Justin Richardson, 25, was arrested Saturday on two probation violation charges and booked into the Union County jail. He is being held in lieu of $4000 bond, according to jail records.

    As seen above, when Richardson’s booking photo was snapped, he made sure to hold his meal up for the camera (the pictured bologna on white bread is just another reason to live a law-abiding life).

    Richardson, whose rap sheet includes busts for marijuana possession, assault, criminal contempt, and breaking and entering, subsequently was a photographed in an orange prison jumpsuit, a more uniform image.

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    No, sadly, Jared Kushner did not register to vote as a woman.

    The 36-year-old Kushner, Donald Trump’s son-in-law, senior adviser, and security blanket--registered to vote in New York City in November 2009. When Kushner filled out his voter registration form, he checked off the "M" box when asked his sex.

    Somehow, voter information available through a LexisNexis commercial database lists Kushner’s gender as female (as reported yesterday in Wired).

    But Kushner’s current voter registration form (seen below) reveals that he is, in fact, 100% male. The document is on file with the New York City Board of Elections.

    When Kushner first registered to vote in New York, he declined to enroll in a political party. In 2011, when he updated his registration to include his new Park Avenue address, he again checked off the "I do not wish to enroll in a party" box.

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    A Connecticut man wearing a “Beer + Beer = Shenanigans” t-shirt was arrested Saturday night for drunk driving.

    But you knew that already.

    Nathan Corey, 38, was collared after a Connecticut State Police trooper pulled him over around 10 PM upon spotting Corey’s vehicle striking a sidewalk (and violating other traffic laws).

    Corey, cops say, failed subsequent field sobriety tests. A police search also turned up marijuana, drug paraphernalia, and a small machete.

    Booked on an assortment of criminal and vehicular charges, Corey was freed from custody after posting $10,000 bail. He is scheduled for an October 3 appearance in Superior Court.

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    In an appalling violation of a sacred space, an Illinois man was robbed at gunpoint Saturday evening as he watched college football in his man cave, Peoria police report.

    The 9:30 PM robbery, investigators say, occurred as the homeowner was relaxing in his renovated garage, the door to which was open.

    While sitting on his couch, the victim heard a noise in the man cave. When he turned toward the sound, he saw a young man pointing a gun at his head. The intruder demanded cash, but when the victim said he had none, the gunman instead stole a cell phone.

    The victim told police that the gunman appeared to be in his 20s. A possible accomplice was hiding behind a car parked in the driveway, the victim told cops.

    As first reported by the Journal Star, a police dog was brought to the crime scene, but was unable to track the armed robber.  

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    Following his arrest yesterday in Tupelo, Mississippi, Gregory Baker, 35, was booked into the county jail, where he posed for the above mug shot.

    Charged with misdemeanor domestic violence and telephone harassment, Baker remains locked up in lieu of $2000 bond.

    As seen below, Baker posed for a second mug shot, apparently after Lee County jail personnel realized that his message t-shirt was not suitable for public viewing.

    The original booking photo was uploaded to the jail’s web site, but was replaced this afternoon with the image of Baker wearing his shirt inside out.

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    A married couple is facing obscenity charges after they allegedly filmed themselves having sex in a Louisiana public library and then uploaded the video to their PornHub page, according to police.

    Investigators last week received a “report of lewd activity that occurred within a public library” in Houma, a city about 55 miles southwest of New Orleans. The suspects, cops charge, “recorded themselves performing sexual activities on each other and uploaded them to a porn site.”

    A subsequent probe identified the alleged library fornicators as Elizabeth Jernigan, 33, and her husband Rex, 35.

    A review of the couple’s PornHub page--which contains more than 160 explicit videos--revealed that the Jernigans recorded themselves engaged in sexual activity “in various other businesses throughout the City of Houma and Terrebonne Parish,” cops say.

    The duo’s PornHub videos show Elizabeth exposing herself and masturbating inside various businesses at the Southland Mall in Houma, a local Walmart, and a Burger King. The public library video includes similar explicit exploits and concludes with Elizabeth performing oral sex on her husband in front of a periodicals rack.

    The Jernigans (seen in the above mug shots) were each charged with six counts of obscenity, news of which Rex shared on the couple’s PornHub page after their release on bail. “To all my friends and follwers,the wife and i just recently bailed out of jail for our public videos we posted on pornhub, hopefully soon we'll get to post a new video soon,” wrote Jernigan, who uses the handle “Sexybeast82.” His wife’s moniker is “LaylaDevine.”

    The couple’s PornHub page has 4187 subscribers and its videos have been viewed more than 1.7 million times. In a brief “About” notation on PornHub, Rex Jernigan wrote that, “I've always loved to be nude and show off the body since I was a teenager.” He added, “hope everyone enjoys our videos...the more attention we receive,the more we'll post.”

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    Meet Rebecca Lynn Phelps.

    The 30-year-old Floridian is jailed on a battery charge after she allegedly became angry and struck a male acquaintance in the face when he declined to have sex with her, cops report.

    Officers responded to Phelps’s New Port Richey home around 2 AM yesterday, according to a complaint affidavit.

    Phelps and the victim had been drinking outside her residence when she “started to get mad with the victim because he did not want to have sexual relations with her.” Phelps then allegedly “started to scream and smack the victim.”

    Phelps also scratched the man’s right arm, drawing blood. She had the victim's skin under her nails when she was examined by deputies.

    During police questioning, Phelps “stated nothing happened” and said she did not know what caused the man to bleed. A witness who was inside the residence at the time of the confrontation told police that he heard the victim yell to Phelps, “Please stop hitting me,” and “then he heard a smack.”

    Pictured above, Phelps was arrested for misdemeanor battery and booked into the county jail, where she is locked up on $500 bond. A judge has ordered her to have no contact with the victim.

    battery, Florida
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    A woman being booked into an Illinois jail had a loaded handgun hidden in her vagina, according to corrections officers who found the weapon during a strip search of the suspect.

    Amika Witt, 20, and a male acquaintance were arrested early Thursday morning after their car was stopped for speeding on Interstate 55 just north of Bloomington. A police search of the vehicle and its occupants turned up heroin and Ecstasy.

    Witt, seen at right, was subsequently transported to the McLean County jail, where the intake process included a strip search.

    During the search of Witt, a female jailer recovered a loaded Kimber .380 caliber handgun from the suspect’s vagina. The gun--seen below in a photo from the manufacturer’s web site--had a fully loaded clip and a bullet in the chamber.

    The handgun weighs 13.4 ounces with an empty magazine and is 5.6” long.

    In addition to narcotics possession charges, Witt, who lives in Missouri, was also hit with a felony weapons count. She is locked up in lieu of $40,035 bond.

    Yes, this has happened before. And before.

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    A group of nurses at a Denver hospital was suspended for ogling the genitals of a male patient, a violation that occurred while the man was incapacitated and even after he died and was placed in a body bag.

    Hospital administrators learned of the disturbing incidents after a Denver Health Medical Center staffer overheard one of the nurses gossiping about viewing the decedent’s private parts.

    According to a Denver Police Department report, “Multiple staff members viewed the victim while he was incapacitated, including after he was deceased.” The peeping occurred between March 31 and April 3.

    Upon learning of the nurses’s behavior in May, hospital brass contacted police, who ultimately decided to have the hospital handle the matter administratively. The victim and the five nurses involved have not been identified.

    Four of the nurses have returned to work, while a fifth caregiver no longer works at the hospital (though she was not fired, a spokesperson says).