Simulated Reindeer Fornication Prompts Florida Pensioner To Summon Cops

A 65-year-old Florida man called Florida cops on Christmas Eve to report that an unknown perpetrator had repositioned plastic lawn reindeer so that the holiday decorations appeared in a “compromising position, because one was male and the other female.”

In addition to the simulated copulation, the man also found it necessary to report that a chair had been moved from his front porch to his front lawn. No damage was done to his property, “but the complainant wants the incident documented,” according to a police report excerpted here.

Sadly, the senior citizen was not arrested for wasting police resources in his drive to keep others off his lawn.

Comments (3)

Obviously he didn't shake his fist vigorously enough at the local street toughs. Damn Kids why I ought ta...
I guess if you can report Mickey D's for being out of chicken nuggets, you can report somebody for making your plastic reindeer a fornicator, or should I say for being put in a "compromising position". Hey, where do you think those little plastic reindeer come from anyway????
I actually know a guy from Illinois who was arrested as a teenager for repeatedly doing this to a neighbor. After the second or third time, the cops stayed outside and caught him doing it again.