Drunk Man On Way To Jail Attempts To Urinate Out Window Of Moving Sheriff's Cruiser, Fails Spectacularly
Meet Devin Langford.
While handcuffed in the back of a patrol car following a drunk driving arrest, the 23-year-old Floridian attempted to urinate out the window of the moving car, an audacious effort that failed miserably when Langford “misaimed” and showered the cruiser’s interior with urine, police report.
According to an Indian River County Sheriff’s Office report, Langford was pulled over last month for speeding by Deputy Brian Bell. Besides noting that Langford had “red, glassy, and bloodshot eyes” and slurred speech, Bell also reported spotting “a plethora of empty beer cans” littering Langford’s truck.
After failing a series of field sobriety tests, Langford was arrested by Bell and then placed in a squad car for transport to the county jail for booking.
En route to the lockup, Langford informed Bell that he needed to urinate. The deputy initially told the detainee that he would have to wait until they arrived at the jail. But Langford knew he would not last that long. So, as Bell reported, Langford “asked me if he could urinate in my car.” Bell--in a remarkably magnanimous gesture--told the arrestee that “if he had to urinate in my car, that I understood.”
“I’m very, very, very sorry I have to pee in the back of your car. I did not want to pee in the back of your car. Trust me,” said Langford, who is pictured in the above mug shot.
It was then that Langford came up with an ingenious plan to mitigate any possible urine damage to Bell’s vehicle. “Um, I’m gonna try and aim out the window,” he announced.
Though Bell advised that this was not a prudent course of action, Langford--who had already maneuvered his cuffed hands to the front of his body--“proceeded to pull down his trousers, kneel on the back seat, and attempt to urinate out the rear passenger side window” of the patrol vehicle “while it was in motion.”
Unfortunately for all involved, “Langford misaimed,” resulting in “his urine landing on the passenger side seat and floorboard” of the cop car.
Once at the jail, Langford was given a Breathalyzer test that showed his blood alcohol content was nearly twice the legal limit. “I might be a little drunk, but I’m not a lot of drunk,” Langford assured jailers. Remarkably, he was booked solely on the misdemeanor DUI count. No additional charges were tacked on for his harebrained urine escapades.
Langford appeared last week in Circuit Court, where he pleaded no contest to the July 10 drunk driving charge. He was sentenced to a year of probation and ordered to attend DUI school. He also had his driver’s license suspended for six months.