A Satisfied Walmart Patron Is Arrested

Man with sticky fingers nabbed (but not for theft)

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Sticky Fingers

NOVEMBER 22--Need another reason to avoid your local Walmart during the holiday shopping crush? Here goes:

A man is facing an obscenity charge for allegedly masturbating while watching porn on a laptop in the electronics department of a Walmart in West Monroe, Louisiana, cops say.

According to an arrest report, Alexander Pearce, 28, was captured Friday afternoon on store surveillance video “hunched over a laptop with his hands in his pants.” Pearce, seen at right, had been barred from the retailer since July, when he was arrested for shoplifting.

When a cop confronted Pearce outside the Walmart, he claimed to have been “watching music videos on a laptop.” While initially denying that he viewed pornographic material, Pearce “then admitted he was looking at ‘pictures.’”

Though he denied masturbating in the store, Pearce reportedly told an officer that he “probably” still had ejaculate “on his hands from 4 hours prior.” The arrest report, thankfully, does not further expound on Pearce’s sticky fingers.

Pearce, whose address is listed in court records as a residence in Sharpsburg, Georgia, was booked into the local jail on a felony obscenity count and a misdemeanor trespass charge. His bond has been set at $5200. (2 pages)