Yes, That Cocaine Was In Your Dealer's Butt

Troubling trend emerges from review of police reports

Crack Cocaine

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Crack In Crack

MARCH 15--After years of carefully reading and analyzing police reports and probable cause affidavits, TSG has arrived at an important conclusion about the drug trade:

That crack you’re smoking was likely secreted at some point in your dealer’s anus.

Witness last night’s arrest of Marcel Foster, 23, following a traffic stop in South Carolina. According to a Spartanburg County Sheriff’s Office report, a deputy spotted a “leafy substance” on the floor of Foster’s 2006 Nissan Altima. He also detected a “strong odor of cologne.”

A subsequent check of the vehicle turned up two bags of marijuana, while a search of Foster yielded $1757 in his pants pocket. Foster was arrested, handcuffed, and placed in a cruiser for the trip to the county detention facility.

At the lockup, Foster was strip searched and jailers “found a large white rock like substance inside of a clear bag in his buttocks.” Which, it seems, is a favored storage facility for street dealers.

Foster, pictured in the above mug shot, was charged with drug trafficking, drug possession, and driving with a suspended license. He remains jailed in lieu of $3040 bond. (1 page)

Comments (12)

I feel a lot of pity for Marcel. He had almost $2000 on him, but can't raise $3000 for bail, and his homies aren't standing up and helping out either, even though he was going around with their crack in his butt. His life is going to be short and painful if he doesn't change. I hope it's not too late, and he gets the wakeup call he needs before it is too late. People like Jesse Jackson are going out to Wisconsin to help out the unions, and Chicago to help out Rahm. They NEED to help out people like Marcel instead.
nah. I say let the stupid people weed themselves out. The guy is walkin around with CRACK (that he would gladly sell to YOUR CHILDREN!!) in his A$$. Natural selection is the way to go. :)
His motto is: We put the crack in crack.
"...and finger-lickin' good."
Baby exlax is an ingredient in crack hence ''good shiat'' man.
Having the crack in the "crack" of his a-- is'nt quite as bad as in his anus anyway. Don't think I want either one tho.
Ha! I always thought dope users were a bunch of asses and now it might well be that they're just addicted to sh!t and not the dope itself. And there's news out that some bales of pot were found in a sewer in Arizona. Now, I can understand why dope users say, "Dude, give me some of that sh!t." But hey....being that the U.S. gets some of our vegetables and fruits from Mexico, might some of us stand to get addicted to sh!t, too since they have a nasty habit of using sewer water for irrigation?
this has been going on for atleast a decade obviously cops are now hip
My crack smells like sh!t too.
Good one.
Maybe that's why it's called crack???
This explains the "sagging" pants trend. Showing off his "butt" crack.