1) Like most states, Florida's motor vehicle department maintains an amusing list of alphanumeric license plate combinations that are off limits to motorists. That list, reproduced here, includes classic no-no variations like fuc, coc, and hor. But don't ask us why you can't get Danny, Jitrbug, or Judith in the Sunshine State. And as for all those outlawed plates beginning with AA or KC, they're ham radio call signs. But we were so impressed with one forbidden Florida tag that we're racing to New York's DMV to nab "Pimpala" for our Chevy. (4 pages)

2) We can't wait for the start of next month's racketeering trial of Atlanta strip club king Steven Kaplan, because several athletes will reportedly be forced to testify about their illicit sexual activity in Kaplan's joint. As New York's Daily News first reported, federal prosecutors want NBA star Patrick Ewing to testify about said hijinks. In fact, according to ex-stripper Debbie Pinson, she once spotted Ewing on the receiving end of some real VIP treatment. Pinson's account is contained on a scratchy audio tape recently filed in court by Kaplan's attorney. Here's an MP3 excerpt of that tape, which was secretly recorded by Kaplan's private investigator.

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