DOCUMENT: Animals, Celebrity

Dunces And Dragons

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Komodo Dragon

Gary Condit's Bit Part

1) Countering Sharon Stone's assertion that employees did little to aid her husband after his June 9 run-in with that ornery Komodo dragon, Los Angeles Zoo officials have released these internal memos describing their response to the attack and how workers tried to calm a "hysterical" Stone. (5 pages)

2) With rumors swirling about the nature of Representative Gary Condit's relationship with missing intern Chandra Levy, here's a strange footnote to the career of the embattled California Democrat, one that you won't find on his resume.

Condit makes an uncredited appearance in the 1988 cult classic "Return of the Killer Tomatoes." The film, a sequel to 1978's "Attack of the Killer Tomatoes,"features George Clooney in one of his first film roles, and Rick Rockwell, the guy who wed a complete stranger on Fox's disastrous "Who Wants to Marry a Multi-millionaire." The movie's real stars, of course, are the bloodthirsty tomatoes bent on world domination.

The film was produced by Steve Peace, one of Condit's closest political allies (at the time, both men were members of the California state assembly).

Condit, who has no lines, appears in a bizarre fight scene that was shot in a pizza restaurant in Chula Vista (the heart of Peace's San Diego-area district). Dressed in a black windbreaker and wearing a Chicago Cubs cap, Condit is seated at a booth with a brawny co-worker (seen here). Clooney is at the adjoining table, seated back-to-back with Condit.

Somehow, a fight breaks out between a trio of cowboys,three ninjas, and two karate experts. Simultaneously, Muammar Khadafy wrestles on the floor with Peace's character, one Wilbur Fin letter (what, you thought Bergman wrote this stuff?). With the brawl raging around him and his friend, Condit gets into the action when a hapless combatant (from the Wild West team)gets throttled and lands at the base of his table.

Condit lifts the dazed cowboy's hat from his head,allowing his brawny buddy to crack a beer bottle over the prone man's noggin. Hooray for Hollywood.