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    Meet Phuc Kieu.

    The Floridian, 58, was watching gay pornography in his Honda Civic yesterday afternoon when he allegedly pulled a male passerby into the vehicle, and then straddled the man while trying to tear off the victim's clothes.

    The 21-year-old victim eventually escaped from the car and ran away yelling, “Rapist!,” according to a Gainesville Police Department report.

    Phuc Kieu was charged with sexual assault, kidnapping, and robbery without a weapon. The latter charge stemmed from the alleged theft of the victim’s backpack, which contained $220 the man had withdrawn from an ATM immediately before being yanked into Phuc Kieu’s car.

    Police reported that Phuc Kieu “laid the driver’s seat all the way back and proceeded to watch homosexual pornography on a portable DVD player” before pouncing on the victim, punching him in the mouth, and pulling him into the Honda (where Phuc Kieu allegedly “began to pull off his shirt, belt, and pants”).

    Seen in the above booking photo, Phuc Kieu, a Vietnamese immigrant who lives in Orlando, is being held in the Alachua County jail in lieu of $150,000 bond on the three felony counts.

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    A veteran mailman distributed methamphetamine while driving along his Texas route in a U.S. Postal Service vehicle, investigators charge.

    Edward Flores, 39, is facing felony narcotics charges following a 10-month investigation by state investigators and the Drug Enforcement Administration. Flores, seen at right, is free on $10,000 bond.

    According to cops, Flores has worked for the postal service for more than 20 years. His wife is the postmaster in Lorena, a city outside Waco where the couple lives.

    During surveillance operations, investigators watched as Flores, wearing his mailman’s uniform, delivered methamphetamine. The probe of Flores--who worked from a Waco post office--was prompted by tips to law enforcement that narcotics was being sold from his residence, as well as from a U.S. Postal Service vehicle being driven by a uniformed worker.

    During a raid last week at Flores’s home, cops seized methamphetamine worth $17,000.

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    A 350-pound Walmart shopper was arrested yesterday after he was found sitting atop five stolen rib eye steaks in the seat of a motorized scooter that he was riding around the South Carolina store.

    Rodney Fowler, 43, was spotted Tuesday afternoon placing the steaks in his scooter by a Walmart loss prevention officer, according to a police report.

    “Suspect sat on the steaks and exited the store passing all points of sale, without attempting to pay for said merchandise,” cops noted.

    The 5’ 5” Fowler was then confronted by the Walmart worker and escorted back into the store, where he was later arrested by police for shoplifting. “Due to his size, the suspect was cuffed using two pairs of cuffs,” investigators noted.

    Pictured above, Fowler spent about three hours in police custody before being released without bond. The fate of the rib eye steaks Fowler sat upon is not addressed in the police report (though here’s hoping Walmart did not re-shelve the pressed meat).

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    Meet Theresa Tumbleson.

    Police are on the lookout for the 35-year-old New Jerseyan, who allegedly allowed her small dog to urinate on 14 dresses and 11 pairs on pants at a clothing store.

    According to investigators, Tumbleson and her pooch yesterday entered a Lane Bryant store in Toms River around 1 PM. The dog, cops report, proceeded to urinate on the garments, causing more than $2000 in damages.

    After the dog soiled the clothing, store personnel asked Tumbleson to leave the business. But she “became belligerent and refused,” prompting workers to dial 911.

    As officers arrived at Lane Bryant, Tumbleson sped away in her Chevrolet Malibu, eventually running several red lights while being pursued by police. Due to the wet roadway and a fear that the pursuit could imperil others, cops discontinued the chase of Tumbleson, who is pictured above.

    In addition to charges stemming from the Lane Bryant incident, Tumbleson will face counts for eluding police and obstruction when she is apprehended. Bail has already been set at $30,000 for the latter charges.

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    Police last night arrested a South Carolina stripper in connection with a brutal stiletto assault that left a female coworker with puncture wounds in her head.

    Carolynn Wright, 22, was arrested by Myrtle Beach cops and charged with assaulting the 24-year-old victim at the Chez Joey strip joint. Wright, seen in the adjacent mug shot, appeared this morning in General Sessions court, where her bond was set at $5000 on the felony count.

    According to a police report, Wright attacked Ashley Michaels-Hoder, 24, last Thursday in a Chez Joey bathroom. Wright allegedly battered Michaels-Hoder with a “clear plastic high-heeled shoe.”

    The beating left Michaels-Hoder with two puncture wounds in her scalp that required staples. Additionally, she suffered a swollen left eye and swelling to her forehead.

    The police report does not reveal a motive for Wright’s alleged attack.

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    Now that their viral video smash has been exposed as a fraud, the creators of “Drunk Girl In Public” have walled off the clip on YouTube--after it racked up more than 11.5 million views.

    The video, which purported to show a series of Los Angeles men angling to take advantage of a drunk woman, was made “private” today on YouTube, where it was part of the channel run by Stephen Zhang, a 20-year-old who describes himself as a “serial entrepreneur.”

    The decision to shelve the video--and forgo additional revenue generated via pre-roll commercials--comes after TSG revealed that the production, billed as a “social experiment,” was entirely staged.

    Additionally, men seen in the video have complained that the video, which was shot on Hollywood Boulevard, made them appear like would-be rapists. Some of the men--who were fed lines and told that the video was either part of a student film project or a “comedic, hidden camera” shoot--have spoken about pursuing legal action against Zhang (seen at right) and his cohorts.

    When one of the men seen in the video complained about his portrayal, Seth Leach, a Zhang collaborator, sent him a private Facebook message noting that, “The important thing to consider is that this video is going to get you well known and have a future with us and our company." Leach, 22, added, “We are going to be huge and you are apart of it. Just go with it dude, you are in our team now and we will take care of you.”

    Leach has since stripped his Facebook page of its photos and posts, including a November 11 message declaring that he, Zhang, soundman Chris Olmedo, and actress Jennifo Box, 24, were the “dream team.” The “Drunk Girl” video has recently been excised from the Facebook pages of Zhang and Box.

    In the wake of TSG’s November 12 report, commenters on Zhang’s YouTube page excoriated him for staging the video and then presenting the filmed interactions as real. As the negative comments (and links to TSG’s story) grew, the commenting option on the “Drunk Girl” video was disabled.

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    A Tennessee woman seeking the Nicki Minaj look was arrested yesterday afternoon after she was caught stealing a wig named after the rapper, cops report.

    Sarah Metcalf, 21, was collared by police after she and a female friend fled from the Chic Beauty Supply store in Memphis, according to criminal complaint.

    Metcalf, pictured at right, allegedly “started stuffing her wig the Nicki Mangi valued at $35 dollars down the front of her pants.” When store owner Do Kim spotted Metcalf and Blair Crumes, 22, swiping the fake hair, he confronted them at the front door and “asked for his wigs back and they could leave.”

    Instead of handing over the stolen merchandise, the pair allegedly shoved their way past Kim, who was bitten on the hand by Metcalf during the skirmish. Both women were charged with theft and booked into the Shelby County jail on the misdemeanor count.

    The 31-year-old Minaj (real name: Onika Maraj) is known for her ever-changing hairstyles, which have been widely knocked off by assorted wig manufacturers.

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    An amorous couple is facing criminal charges after allegedly causing a disturbance at a Massachusetts strip club where they got handsy while seated in front of the stage.

    Security staffers at Ten’s Show Club in Salisbury told cops that Alysson Siopes, 30, and Daniel Tromp, 28, “began to do ‘inappropriate’ things while sitting in the front row near the stage” early Tuesday morning.

    According to a police report, Tromp’s “hands were all over” Siopes’s body, and he “reached up an undid her bra.” Siopes then “began to undo” Tromp’s pants and “made a motion like she was ‘about to give him a blowjob.’” Security guards then intervened and asked the pair to leave. When they refused, 911 was called.

    When cops arrived, Tromp, who was “highly intoxicated,” again refused to leave the strip joint. So he was arrested for disorderly conduct. Siopes was subsequently arrested on the same charge when she persisted in yelling at officers outside the club.

    During a court hearing Wednesday, Tromp and Siopes (seen above) were each ordered to pay $50 fees. If they avoid additional legal trouble over the next three months, the misdemeanor charge will be dismissed.

    Ten’s Show Club covers 16,000 square feet and has four dancing stages and VIP sky boxes. Additionally, patrons can enjoy “table side tee shirt shows”--from $50 and up--that include a “personal table dance & collectible t-shirt.”

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    After striking a pedestrian with his car, a drunk New Jersey man drove for more than a mile with the critically injured victim lodged in the vehicle’s windshield, investigators allege.  

    Responding to a report Monday of an erratic driver, an Ocean Township Police Department officer spotted an auto “with what appeared to be a person lying on the hood of the vehicle.” A cop initiated a traffic stop around 7 PM and found “a person halfway through the vehicle’s windshield,” according to prosecutors.

    A subsequent investigation determined that driver Marcos Ortega, 33, struck the victim when he crossed onto the shoulder on Route 9. Cops estimated that Ortega drove “approximately 1.5 miles” with Kenneth Moeller, 61, lodged in the car’s windshield.

    Moeller was extricated from the vehicle by emergency service workers and transported to the Jersey Shore University Medical Center, where he is listed in critical condition.

    The “impaired” Ortega was charged with drunk driving and leaving the scene of an accident. He was booked into the county jail in lieu of $150,000 bail.

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    The former U.S. Olympian who doubled as a high-priced escort is writing a memoir to be published next year, according to information provided to booksellers.

    Suzy Favor Hamilton, whose secret life was first detailed in these pages, will release “Fast Girl: Running from Madness” in early-June, according to Dey Street Books, a HarperCollins imprint that has recently published books by Amy Poehler, Alan Cumming, and Gene Simmons.

    Retailers have received no specific details about the content of the 320-page work by the 46-year-old Favor Hamilton, who is pictured at right.

    Favor Hamilton’s illustrious running career included three Olympics appearances (1992, 1996, and 2000), collegiate championships, a Nike commercial, and even a swimsuit calendar. Following her retirement, Favor Hamilton--who ran a Wisconsin real estate firm with her husband--did paid promotional work for several organizations, including Disney.

    For more than a year, Favor Hamilton worked as a $600-an-hour hooker for a Las Vegas-based escort firm that also booked her in other U.S. cities. Using the alias “Kelly Lundy,” Favor Hamilton became one of the top-ranked Sin City “providers” on The Erotic Review, a popular online escort review site.

    In 35 separate reviews, “Kelly” received glowing evaluations from johns who spared no explicit details when describing services they were provided by the escort.

    In a December 2012 TSG interview, Favor Hamilton admitted her escort work, saying, “I take full responsibility for my mistakes. I’m not the victim and I’m not going that route.” She added, “I’m owning up to what I did. I would not blame anybody except myself…Everybody in this world makes mistakes. I made a huge mistake. Huge.”

    In a series of Twitter posts after her escort work was disclosed, Favor Hamilton said that the paid encounters provided “coping mechanisms” and “escape” from a life in which she struggled with depression.

    Favor Hamilton, now a certified yoga instructor, recently relaunched her web site, noting that, “I’m not about to hide in shame. I’m here, perfectly willing to remain in the public eye.”

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    Meet Doran Horton.

    Along with allegedly pimping out girls, the 25-year-old Californian enjoys posting photos of his cash, jewelry, and blunts to Facebook. In fact, Horton, a fledgling rapper, likes to lounge beneath a carpet of $100 bills.

    Sadly, Horton’s photo sharing has been curbed following his arrest on a federal charge of sex trafficking a 17-year-old girl. The victim told investigators that she knew Horton “because another girl in her group home was being pimped by him,” according to court records.

    The girl told agents that upon meeting Horton in late-September, he took her phone and purse and refused to return the items. She added that Horton subsequently gave her alcohol and an unknown narcotic, had sex with her, and “for a few hours locked her" in his San Diego garage.

    Horton, who uses the alias “Oso Montana,” is being held without bail after a judge ruled that he was a danger to the community. When federal agents arrested Horton late last month, he denied being the teen’s pimp, but offered the observation that, “everyone has their hustles and he just wants money.”

    If convicted of the federal felony charge, Horton faces a maximum of 10 years in prison.

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    In a brazen daylight cookiejacking attempt, a Maryland man and his underage accomplice tried to steal a “wagon full of Girl Scout Cookies” from two little girls, cops allege.

    According to Anne Arundel police, the Girl Scouts (aged 12 and 13) were selling the cookies Saturday afternoon from a street corner when they briefly stepped away from their wagon. That is when Gabriel Taylor Smith, 18, allegedly took off down the street towards a getaway car.

    One of the girls then gave chase and “grabbed the wagon that contained the cookies.” Smith, cops reported, then “let go of the wagon and then jumped into the suspect vehicle being driven” by his 17-year-old cohort, whose name was not released by police.

    “The girls yelled out that the suspect was taking their cookies,” and neighbors responded by getting in their vehicle and following the getaway car (while simultaneously calling 911).  

    The car was subsequently located at a gas station in Odenton, the community where the two suspects reside. The Girl Scouts later fingered Smith (seen above) and his associate in the attempted cookie heist. Both were charged with misdemeanor theft since the cookies were valued at less than $1000.

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    Not every teenager working at a big box retailer is as dreamy as Alex from Target.

    An 18-year-old Walmart employee who used Old Spice deodorant sticks before returning them to store shelves is facing an embezzlement probe after admitting he swiped more than $1800 in merchandise from a South Carolina store.

    Store security began monitoring Chandler Roberts after he was filmed taking milk and cookies--which he had not purchased--into a break room, according to a police report.

    When confronted about his actions, Roberts “admitted to stealing several items,” and later “returned numerous stolen items to asset protection” officials. Walmart calculated that the purloined goods were worth $1823.25.

    More importantly, as noted by cops, Roberts was twice videotaped “selecting a stick of Old Spice deodorant,” which he proceeded to apply while in the store’s bedding department. On both occasions, the teen then returned the toiletry item to a store shelf. Cops did not address whether the used deodorant ended up being purchased by a customer.  

    Police are continuing to investigate the Walmart thefts.